Hello everybody,
It's been a while isn't it.
I'm sorry I come here only when I need it, not when I should.
Last week one of my good friends passed away. Y.
He was 26.
He died in a car accident in which he wasn't even at fault.
He got crushed, literally, by a truck who's driver was asleep, or texting. He didn't say. The driver in question just said he "didn't realize", he didn't realize he was going full speed toward a stationary car, a car stopped due to a traffic jam. He didn't all the traffic jam. That's hat he said.
The day after we went to Y.'s funeral. When we entered the enormous room I felt overwhelmed. The room was full of white flowers arranged in beautiful patterns. In the middle, a huge picture of Y., half smiling, as always.
Y. was this cold blooded, cynical, hilarious, comical, witted boy. He always had a rictus on his face when he commented on things, and always had a ironical and derisive but still very accurate remark to make.
The last time I met Y. was at Soso's 1st year birthday party, where Shun me and Y. promised each other to have dinner together anytime soon, as we didn't have the chance to talk as we wished we could that day.
Since then I feel like an empty shell. The day of his funeral, I couldn't stop my tears and couldn't wipe then away as I was holding sleeping Solo in my arms.
In front of his coffin I was thinking: "So, that's it? That's how people go? As simply as that? On the road to work? That's how people leave? Without a goodbye? Without a speech? Without a second chance? As simple as that?"
I couldn't stand seeing his pale face in the coffin, that wasn't him, that couldn't be him! Under that think white make up, that's just an empty carcass, no way it is our friend.
His mother told us that his body down his knees was gone, smashed, ripped, and that they had a hard time concealing his face's wounds under the make up.
Then we went back home.
And I've been dreaming of Y. since then, everyday. I'm talking to him, every night. I don't know if I'm still sane or not, but it seems that there's maybe more to him than just being dead.
Maybe he just has been downloaded to another layer of this same world.
